My eyesight has deteriorated again. Not too surprisingly. Feel it coming already. Its not as bad as the last time, but i cant see really small words, unlike usually. My eyes will like blur and cant focus. Luckily for me, i am prepared for it this time round and I would apply some eye drops before papers. I think its likely due to fatigue. I'm really dead tired right now. I guess im gonna sleep early today, LIKE NOW!!! Cant study for nuts anyway, and its the perfect weather to sleep anyway. Its raining showers of blessings!!! Maybe it'll be tears of healing. :-p
It MIGHT not be as bad as i thought. Maybe.
Alot of things have been running through my mind lately again, especially since i've been sleeping late and thus i would have problem sleeping and would lie on the bed for at least half an hour thinking about stuffs without realizing it. Well it can be anything from jobs to future to relationships. But ya been thinking alot. Not that its been very useful. But i did realize quite abit of stuff. Not very good timing as i am already sleeping little and it further reduces my sleep hours. And though most of the realizations are possibly useful, they are not encouraging. Maybe even towards self-defeating. And i guess a bad habit of mine is that i think too much. I guess i should really just trust in God and leave them to God? Easier said than done. I'm a worrier. I worry too much about anything and everything. And i got so used to talking alot to people that maybe i think too much by myself.
Just like Kenn puts it: There are many things that I would like to say, but I don't know how.
I dont know when.
But I know why.
Funny how i realize that i can like rock music alot and yet i like opera works so much. Maybe its due to the friends/feelings of being "high" vs interest and appreciation. Maybe i just like music.
Which part of shouting "Jesus i will live for you" is really true. I believe that its all part of the lyrics that people are saying it and when they're feeling good. Maybe im the meditative type. I prefer saying it like "yea, i will live for Jesus". Saying it meditatively. Saying it sincerely. Come say it with me....
If only ppl would realize the difference that it can make.
if only ppl would understand how much i needed it.
Took sometime to whack me awake again, to study and many others. But at least, i can be awake again. :-p
Sleeping on problems or thinking too much into it makes you feel worse, or in your own world.
Nothing to think about anyway.
Im starting to like economics. Too bad i cant study it again for this exam period. :-p
I realized how wasted my mid year holidays were. Its like i tried to study yet didnt study. And i didnt really had any fun either. So wasted. Neither here nor there. The only enjoyable days i had that i could remember was like fri 25th may, wed 6th june and lr(if i were to exclude thurs the 17th). The rest of the days are like so wasted. I cant stand it. I dont remember what did i do. So sad. Zz. Only 6th was kinda special. I want my time back. =(
I know i shouldnt be blogging. But i couldnt resist this, especially how im feeling now. I am longing to do something i shouldnt(or couldnt) be doing now. especially since i was 'teased' last night.
Ok its like this. I ve been having very vivid dreams last few nights. It is so vivid and so real, and that after i wake up, i felt like i havent sleep like that. See lah, everytime exams are around the corner i become so stressed until i have dream, and very vivid ones some more. Theres 2 bad ones, 1 weird one 1 quite random one, but i guess it was close to something i wanted, and last night, the thing i wanted to do/ to happen, though it isnt exactly a perfect dream, its close to. I like to try to interpret dreams. Some dreams actually might happen for a reason you know. Dont worry i dont dwell on dreams, except maybe last night's one. 1 of the nightmares i had was very chim and super odd. Its like i seemingly am trying to stop this creature from reaching somewhere. Its like i game, then i had to draw crosses at points in a map to reduce its life. But the time limit was like 5 sec and i was doing the map upside down. And after i couldnt stop it, it went to another place, sortof another maze, to my relief. And i am hopefully trying to stop it from reaching that end, but this time, it eats through my defences. However, i noticed there was a hole in my defence, something which it didnt exploit. I dunno the dream felt so scary and fearful lah. Last night one was a great 'teaser' i felt. it was such a great dream you know, but rather than feeling great after it, its like, God are you making fun of me. Lol. Give me this dream at a time where i am dead stressed about the upcoming exams, its not exactly encouraging to give me this dream when i dont need it and like teasing me about the things i want alot. Its like tempting a dog with a bone and asking him to fetch when it's chained to a tree. Not funny you know. oh and the bone will most likely be lost right after it was released some time later. Nvm bad example, but you get my point. Actually, now that i think of it, it is actually something God wanted to show me that thats something I can look forward to after "this" is all over. Something to work towards to? I dont know. Its hard even to think of it this way.
This exam really, i should be, maybe like all other exams, be prepared to fail, badly. Its just i must be able to accept it and say i should be working towards winning the war and not the battle. Its cause all i can see now is a lost battle and its tough to swallow. Im dead stressed at failing this exam AGAIN!!! Im not in that exam mood, and im worried but not working. I cannot take it lah. Im in that "i-cannot-take-this-anymore, i-dont-wanna-care-abt-studying-for-this-exam-anymore" kinda mood. I'm just trying to make sure i dont kill myself of stress and taking measures of it, cause in the past few exams i always fall sick during exam periods like this. Ok i better have a changed mood after taking a nap and get cracking!!!
I dont believe it. The person who owns the dbsk playlist on my blog actually added my page and Speaks man, a solo by junsu and uknow respectively a few hrs ago, and im listening to it now. Thats so cool lah. Except i dont like uknow's song. I hate rap. Uknow, u better not sing more rap song's or i'll start to dislike you. Then again, i doubt he'll pull off a song or ballad very well also But i still like his voice. There's this video 3 years ago praising his bass voice. =) And which super good break dancer who sings but doesn't rap. Then again, my page is also not very nice. =( But i like their concert's hug song. thats their last song of their concert and they still sing pitch perfect lor(except for uknow who spoiled it. BOO!!!). :-p (actually to say the truth, at the end can tell mickey uknow not singing, i hear only 3 parts and no bass. BOO!)
I like so many songs in the playlist, which i have not heard before!!! I like eternal, begin, promise, timeless, fox rain on top all in vain and harudal, and i prefer the cohoosey lover groove remix, sound so much nicer lah. But i don't like the composition of choosey lover. The melody just dont go with thr chords. Its not out of tune, its just not very nice/ I think they're all its a major7 chord or something like that. I'm getting crazy over begin and timeless. :-p My destiny and ashita kuru kara is not bad, but its a typical jap song. Lol. Harudal and all in vain pales in comparison. :-p
Suddenly i feel so free that i dont need to blog. Dont know why i on com so often for what also. :-p
Decided to add this playlist. I was watching DBSk video's just now. Go and listen to Its all in vain and harudal under the playlist. I heard it 1st time today and its very nice. =)
Hmm, maybe you realized the impact of those words to me. Though i totally agree with it and its my fault, those words just would stick to my mind, and linger in pain, for a long time. Its a scar that, im unwilling to face, for now.
You know for me, i really have problem concentrating while trying desperately to study these few days. I am that kinda guy that cannot concentrate with other things bothering me, that keeps coming up in my mind. I guess thats why i am able to pia like i did for o lvls. I didnt care about anything. All i knew in my mind is, i gotta pia for the next few months, and i guess i gotta get back to that mood again, and not letting things to distract me. Though i believe, its gonna be way harder this time round.
The last 2 days have been quite trying and dark days i guess. From what ppl said to what ppl shared, its just scary. Scary thoughts can make me think, whether will i be like this when i grow up. Well, like all scary and worrisome thoughts i have, I have learned through all this more and more to trust in God. I must continue to trust in His hands, that everything will be according to His plan. That every tribulation is not too much for me to take. And that i will be glad and thanful in all things. Like this thought that came to me, anything is good as long as it draws me closer to you.
Anything, thats very tough, but i gotta learn i guess.
Being able to share with people, i guess, have helped me forget and not think about these problems a little bit more. Talking is something i will always love to do, no matter how tired i am. Maybe thats why i don't like emails and online conversations. I cant "talk". :-p
But i guess from problems, it teaches me that i have to talk less. Don't have to tell or talk about everything, and be independent already. Stop relying on others i guess.
Just 3 more things. 1) I got doc letter which means im highly likely pes C L9. Good and bad cause i thought i might miss out on the cool army life which is i guess a once in a lifetime experience and help me to train to be tough and independent, but i guess pest C is fine.
2)My house is under renovation these few days. I shan't say whats changing but i shall its getting more and more each day that its like, COOL!!!
3)I'm stopping blogging- for a while i guess. You can call it hiatus if you want. Though i don't believe in it, i guess from problems i learned that its time i slowed down my blogging, start to talk less and not tell everyone everything. This blog is starting to not serve its initial purpose anyway. Besides, it might help me focus abit cause this week or 2 i have exams. However, i will still be visiting blogs and tagging still, so keep blogging, and keep tagging people, keep me updated about you, and give me some form of short brakes ok?
Anyway, i never believe i can go on personal hiatus. And besides, i might still wanna blog cause i might feel too sian during this coming exam period that i would want to let out some steam. :-p
And i guess, im considerably happy and joyful still.
=D : >
Jason Mraz writes great songs. Just ask my sisters how i would constantly sing You and I both at home horribly, :-p This one is another nice song to listen to sleep, though i don;t really like worldly lyrics. And im so not gonna replace my current song. If you want to hear this song go imeem. :-p
I really got count sheeps you know when i cant sleep. :-p I;m tired. Good night people.
=D : >
Sleeping to Dream About You Jason Mraz
And I I'm dreaming of sleeping next to you and feeling like a lost little boy in a brand new town I'm counting my sheep and each one that passes is another dream to ashes And they all fall down.
And as I lay me down tonight I close my eyes What, what a beautiful sight
[Chorus:] Sleeping to dream about you And I'm so tired Of having to live without you But I don't mind Sleeping to dream about you and I'm so tired
I found myself in the riches Your eyes, your lips, your hair and you were everywhere I woke up in the ditches, I hit the light and I thought you might be here But you were nowhere (you were nowhere) Well You were nowhere
And as I lay me back to sleep Lord I pray that I can keep
[Repeat Chorus]
It's just a little a lullaby to keep myself from crying myself to sleep at night Oh just a lullabye to keep from crying myself to sleep Oh just a, just oh, just a little lullabye,
Sleeping to dream about you And I'm so tired Of having to live without you And I'm so tired
[Repeat Chorus]
Well I'm so, I'm tired I'm falling, I'm so tired, I'm so tired
This is actually a very old article i wanted to post since exactly 2 months ago. Since i still could find time or be bothered to do it, i'll just use it as a article to look at post father's day. Below are some interesting things i have found. I wanted to write on my opinions, but i am too lazy. :-p so read it its a very good article on fathers. I would say, i would feel that i will be the kind of the father that will rather spend most of his time with his child than working unless i need to. What could be more important than spending time with your kids and ensuring that, by God's grace, them being a faithful servant to the Lord? :-p Click on the title to go to the article. =)
"You have savings plans. You have vacation plans. But how many of you have a parenting plan?"
"The effects of this physical or emotional absenteeism are actually quantifiable: numerous academic studies have shown that children with distant fathers score lower on tests of empathy, reasoning and brain development than those whose fathers are more involved. The former behave more aggressively, don't get on as well with siblings, tend to be less popular in school and are more reluctant to take responsibility for their misbehavior. In 2002, the U.S. National Center for Policy Analysis concluded that kids with physically absent fathers were up to three times more likely to use drugs and engage in criminal behavior. Last month, an Israeli study reported that children with absent fathers were more likely to have trouble forming new relationships, whether the absences were permanent or shorter term. When children reach school age, Australian psychologist Paul Amato found, fathers are even more important to self-esteem than mothers."
"Not surprisingly, the more involved the father, the smarter and better adjusted kids tend to turn out. A 1993 Harvard study showed that the amount of time a father spends with his children can actually affect their ability at math, and that children whose fathers encourage them in sports are more successful in their adult careers. Other researchers have found that children who were fathered well are more tolerant and socially responsible as adults."
"Multitasking and an accelerated workflow present other challenges for the single-task-oriented male brain."
"But unlike their fathers, Asian men today face an epoch-shifting change: the entry of women into the workforce. Having two incomes has brought economic benefits to countless families, and given women rich opportunities for fulfillment, but it has left men scrambling to become the fully fledged co-parents their wives now need them to be. In fact, many men are experiencing, for the first time, the conflicting pulls of career and home that have long bedeviled working women. These overstretched fathers are still getting used to the idea that they're no longer excused from taking on a wider family role. Increasingly, they are "sharing more housework with their spouses, such as buying groceries, picking up the kids from school, changing diapers and feeding the babies,"
"At IBM in Singapore, 70% of the 3,000 mostly male employees regularly participate in the firm's "mobility program," which lets them work from home as long as they can be contacted via e-mail or phone. In addition, fathers are allowed to work 22 half-days in every six months if they use that extra time for family purposes."
"runs two websites for fathers, publishing articles with titles like "Let's Master the Three Categories of Housework." But not so long ago, he says, he was a living anachronism—the kind of father who "couldn't cook or do any kind of housework." He decided to change when he realized that he no longer wanted to depend on his wife's ministrations. So, Endo began to teach himself how to become a modern male, juggling the demands of his home and his business. Endo's discovery: "You can handle it as long as you're ingenious about the time you do have."
"Cheerfully dealing with myriad commitments, being smart about your time, and accepting that being a parent means being responsible for both the material and emotional welfare of your children: this is the new way of Asian fatherhood. Gentlemen, does it remind you of anyone? But of course. "Women are doing it," says Endo. "So why can't we?"
Ok i quit soccer- at least for the next 5 months? Lol. I got serious muscle cramps again. Zz. Very painful lah. Super sharp until i was crying out in pain.
Last night, we had a family outing with my uncles and aunties. The bad thing is, i was very sick last night, and i had to sit out of the family table, lying on the sofa resting. Oh wells. But the weirdest thing is, father's day celebration ended up being being a 9 man morris competition between me and my uncles. Haha. Anyone heard of it? Its a board game found in my uncles box of board games. We virtually spent the whole night playing it lah. And ya i played through my sickness. But oh well. After some rest, today was really fine i guess.
random comment: I just got reminded, how someone made me feel in the past, so easily, just by the use of "words".
I know ive been blogging alot lately. I guess when i have more and more things cooped up, or stressed, or with no one to say stuff i guess, so I'll say it here lor. Lol. K lah. Im going to do a timetable now. Should have done it a few days ago already. Tmr is chiong sua all the way. Pray for me, that i'll be focused on studying. The problem with me is, i have to really be focused in order to be able to study. I cannot multitask. Or not, I really cant study.
You know recently my close primary school friend added me to friendster. I was like. woah. Now that i think of it. We havent been talking for like 2-3 years. The last time i saw him was like when we were sec 1/2. Back when we were primary sch friends we were quite close. Even up to sec sch, we still visited each others homes once every few months. We just have a knack of clicking well with each other and we can chat on all kinda nonsense and play catch up with each other.
I guess we're both very sociable so easily started with each other back then even with little contact. Recently when he added me, i was like, HE HAS SUPER LONG HAIR. You know those punk long hair kind. At the back. I was like. Woah. He has changed quite abit. I remember only bringing him to church once for some christmas service back in sec 3 i think. Woah. I think for me hes just one of the growing list of ppl i have lost touch with i guess. The problem with being sociable- i can slowly bit by bit forget about people, like just how i have lost touch with all my pri sch friends, and even maybe sec sch. I guess Maybe pri sch is far(*sigh*) but i can tell you sec sch is also getting forgotten already. *sigh*. I guess since none of us actually made the effort to come back to meeting each other, we just drifted apart so easily. 2 of my closest sec sch friends just drifted away so easily too. I hardly keep contact with one and the other has totally stopped because he doesnt use com very much. Zz. See what i said about relationships being high maintenance. Lol.
I guess for certain friends its hard to relate to them how is it to be close. To them, especially common to most task oriented friends, or especially most guy friends, talking- not even sharing, makes us good friends. To some, sharing at the surface lvl can make us good friends. But are we seriously close? This came to mind because of certain friends, plus the thought of the good friends that i have lost touched, makes me think about this. How come we stopped communicating so easily? How about a 2nd scenario.
If one friend is sharing alot about his(ok lets just use he for everything) life, and the other is not sharing, or doesnt ask/ seem concerned about the other's life, are they close, or is it a "1 sided-affair". Lol. Sometimes i see this happening alot in quite a few relationships in my life. Whether its me to others, or others to me. I guess it also depends on our willingness to want to be close to someone. Well. I guess i have some friends whom are trying to be closer friends with me but i guess i reject it. Well, 1 of the reasons for 1 is because i feel that he aint a christian subconsciously, so theres no want to share or be too close because we have different set of core values. I guess thats for me. Well, i guess it happens to me more now than it was in the past. My 2 close sec sch friends aint christians so...
Back to the topic. To certain others, i guess it starts to seem abit weird that they tell you about them alot/ you know about them alot, but they dont seem too concerned to know about you/they dont ask how you've been, or vice versa. I guess i make that mistake alot too. I guess its the problem of committing. Sometimes when we commit, we would want something in return i guess. It happens to sch friends too that it seems so weird that we actually call ourselves good friends. I mean its like, you dont know abt me much, or I dont know abt you much. You get what im saying?(Han's tagline) Lol. I guess this is a really tough topic. I mean for me, its hard to bridge that communication barrier because you dont share with me enough. Sometimes its also really tough to speak more to yfers that we're not so close cause they are not willing to share more. I guess what August says about 2 people having to have the same communication level. If 1 party is not willing, it'll always be stuck there. It happens across the board, whether it be consciously or subconsciously not sharing enough. Lvl 4 trying to be lvl 5 but the opposite party is not willing. Same for Lvl 3 trying to be lvl 4 but the opposite party is not willing. You get what im saying? I guess it gets on my nerves sometimes. But well, people are like that.
Sorry i blog so much again. Once i start i cant stop. And im sorry im blogging so much on relational stuff when i should spend time on something else. I guess my life is driven by relationships alot.
Have i mentioned on how i am somehow able to communicate with people who are anti socials or even outcasts? Lol.
If only people will actually take the initiative to ask me so, you won't know how glad i would be, if people actually know what im talking about.
But it will never happen.
And i guess life would be really tough the next 6 months.
And i realized something when i was lazing around in bed today.
Get up and get over it.
Last night, while studying(:-p), i have this thinking on ow big or important does God view studies. It's probably as important as fulfilling your responsibilities i think. If its anything more than that, then theres something wrong. You know i was so encouraged by this testimony 1 of my christian friend told me, about his friend who study God's word very regularly even when he doesn't even have enough time to study. You know i have this thought, that God would say to me up in heaven, why didn't you speak to me during these days? Would my reason of studying be good enough? Playing? Too busy? But then again, im not saying studying is not important, im just saying that certain things we should not sacrifice. To me, i have to learn to sacrifice playing!!!
Again, ultimately, whatever we do should glorifiy God. Its scary that everything has to be glorifying to God, and its possible. Seriously.
Ok enough ranting. :-p
Reply to tags: Rui/ Joash: I dont understand what you all are saying or mean. :-p
I so wanna get this album, and i just love the way casting crown writes they're songs- all from God's inspiration, all from bible verses. Watch the sneak preview at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KEIa7jNBr7s
You know, im actually looking forward to the next 12 months, not in comm. I guess i look forward to after A's, and most importantly, growing! I have never thought it this way, but im optimistic on the next 12 months of growing. Time to sign up for some bible studies? =D
Time to study now. Lol.
If only i get to do it 1 more time before A's, but i guess it won't happen. Oh well. :-p
The other side of me is really unhappy with someone, but yet i cant get myself to, though at times i really wanna let that person know. I know its not good to be unhappy with ppl, but i guess its an unresolved problem and i guess it cannot be resolved anytime soon. Zz.
Last night, I could not sleep. I felt a strong pain, and i realized it felt something like
心痛
Well, at least thats what i thought cause it was triggered by thoughts. I guess it was the thought that other things could come ahead of our "friendship". Anyway, it became more and more a real bad headache i just fell asleep through it. Actually, i woke up feeling quite good today.
Ok. I'll admit. If you didn't notice it, im actually not the least bit happy, though i feel blessed that so many went to celebrate my birthday just now. Partially because of details i guess. Partially i guess sugar rush came but did not became 'high' but rather headache. The rest i shall not say.
I failed to do something.
John 15:12 This is my commandment, That ye love one another, as I have loved you. John 15:13 Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.
Self sacrifice, something that i have failed to do. You know i felt bitter with my friends, that i felt forsaken. Well wishes is one thing, help is another. Ok i shall not explain too much or go into details. But ya. I felt forsaken. It is so easy to want things to go the way you want it to, but it won't. God made me realize and to think of these verses, that its better that i sacrifice for others, than for them to sacrifice for me i guess. I am just so bothered all these while on why people will not do something out of their norm even to just do something with me.The biggest thing that really hits me is that it speaks alot on how much i mean to them i feel. I guess its so easy to say no to things that they believe its not beneficial to them. I guess its so easy to be selfish. But me too. Though i can use words to cover how i really feel, i actually can't get myself to "be noble"(though i actually hinted).
Somethings i really don't get it. 1 moment its left, 1 moment its right. Which way do you truly wanna go? My mum just used a phrase to describe it best.
I DON'T UNDERSTAND YOU.
These are the things i have to settle with God, or not i'll be sleeping through my problems, and thus sleeping alot because these things bother me so much, and i just sleep to avoid it. I whole night im unwilling to wake up to live in certain thoughts. Now i realize, its sin. Just some more things to share.
John 14:15 If ye love me, keep my commandments.
I read this from a book on the definition of true love that Jesus gave us. True love isn't some warm tingly feeling. I guess thats passion. Other than the 2 verses that i mentioned earlier which gives 1 aspect of true love, which is self sacrifice, the 2nd and probably the most important is probably commitment, and obedience to God. You think making sacrifices is hard, obeying God can be even harder. So the definition of true love(theres actually more i guess from the bible) is self sacrifice, commitment and obedience to God. Which part of it is a feeling? Their all 'tasks' rather than feelings. Rather than love being not a feeling, Jesus just wants to show us than contrary our beliefs that love is a feeling, it actually requires doing. The phrase "love is a verb, an action. It ain't a noun. Its more than just a feeling." is thus given more meaning i feel. More personal thoughts.
I feel that relationships are more important than tasks. Though tasks are important to do to maintain a relationship(eg pray to maintain relationship with God), they are not more important than a relationship. What is the most important thing as christians? Having a personal relationship with God. Tasks are important, but i guess to me im convicted that relationships and people are more important, thus maybe thats why im people-oriented.
I wish i can settle these things in my mind soon, but i guess i cant. The challenge to me is to wake up EARLY tomorrow fired up to study with so many questions in my mind(remember im someone who gets bogged down by feelings alot). I have almost zero motivation to study again. You know i found from lr that the solution to me starting to feel down is by taking a short nap, but my problem at home is, i'll sleep for very long!!!
Just a song to share, that Rui shared to us during lr, which rachel shared to him. :-p The lyrics are great and it means alot to me, especial since i need to sacrifice!!!(the bolded words are lyrics that have special meaning to me.) I was the one who uploaded it to imeem cause they dont have it.
Now playing:
The Day I Lay My Isaac Down Scott Krippayne
I have a prayer as pure as gold That where You lead me I will go And I'll embrace the holy plea Each time your Spirit calls to me
And in that hour, and in that time When I must lose my will in Thine My true devotion will be found The day I lay my Isaac down
Each sacrifice You call me to I'll die to self, I'll live for You Take up the cross, forsake the crown The day I lay my Isaac down
Your Lamb of Love, Thy blessed friend Nailed to the altar for each sin There in my place Your Son was bound The day You laid Your Isaac Down
Each sacrifice You call me to I'll die to self, I'll live for You Take up the cross, forsake the crown The day I lay my Isaac down
Take up the cross, forsake the crown The day I lay my Isaac down
Lol. No one remembered. Well, at least people who weren't around did. Thanks so much bro. Though people forget, at least you remember too. And Ah Choo. :-p
Anyway,something random i wanted to say. Thats why im here and i read my tags. Just wanted to say that that 10-15min or so actually was seemingly long and painful. Some realization came to my mind that actually made me think that, I have my thinking is actually wrong all this while. Its like sian. Sitting there and just pondering. MAybe cause it was the state of mind and fatigue. But well, its still lingering in my mind and im still questioning myself, but it doesn't feel that bad liao. But its still there.
Oh i forgot to mention. Star(Byul) is super nice. So is maria. Beautiful girl and miss you much is quite nice too.
In quite a bad mood cause ive not been studying today again. I wasted half the day going to simei and realizing i didnt bring my warranty and receipt. Zzz.
Birthday in 2 days!!!! But i will be in camp, so... Lol.
Benefits of reading books/ I Kissed Dating Goodbye, a Great Book!!!!
Added: You know Im starting to understand the benefits of reading books. You know so much time is wasted while traveling, and if we were to just read a book, especially one that will benefit us, and not a story book, time would not be just wasted like that.. You know after reading the book I have mentioned earlier, it really helped me learn alot. Though not everything applies, there is so many things that i have learned from the book that gives me a whole new perspective of a lot of things. It actually does prove that yes alot of my thinkings are on the right track, but yet there is so many that i have learned that really speaked to me alot. I think it has given e a whole new perspective in alot of things. And though alot of things i don't need it now, I know in the future it will help so much, and it helps MAKE THE MINDSET RIGHT IN THE 1ST PLACE. Everytime i read the book, i would often stop to ponder, and expose some of my flawed thinkings, and learn to change it. Though not everything i 100% agree that we must do, it still allowed me to know that sometimes that alternative would be better. The book has just been great. Hopefully i could finish reading by the end of the hols.
I HAVE TO STUDY!!! There is so much i have to study. Haiz. Well, at least im looking forward to lr, and movies(f4, shrek and oceans 13). =D
I just watched a korean movie, 200 pounds beauty at home with my sisters yesterday. The movie is nice. Go watch it!!! Listen to the songs, its nice. I'm starting to like korean movies. =)
Today has started off badly, because I OVERSLEPT AND MISSED MY MOVIE!!!
You know i woke up at 830 and thought too early, and my alarm can still wake me up at 910. But, i ended up waking up at 11, and the movies starts at 11.15. There is no way i could have made it lah. I wanted to take taxi and all but i knew take taxi also cannot make it de. Its in orchard lol. ok say the movie only begins at 1130 latest. The taxi ride alone takes almost half an hour. Lol. How to make it. ZZ. And i was so looking forward to it.
Hope you're not too unhappy with me. I know just how many time you called. Really I know. And im so sorry. Please forgive me k? The next time i'll make it. Promise.
Partially cause, I HAVE NOT STUDIED!!! like i did 1 question today? ZZZ... Spent whole day with mum in hospital. But its good. Have not been spending time with mum alot and its great family time. Get to know mum's church friend. But didn't get the chance to study cause ppl's been visiting. ZZ. Like im so gonna fail. Mum seems ok though abit frail. Thanks for all your encouragements!!! Like the whole group of ppl who goes to church camp know liao. 1 great evidence. I didn't tell gavin and he knew!!! And everyone is like sending me encouraging words and smses, even from malaysia. Thanks alot ppl!!! =D
AND IM GONNA WATCH MOVIE TOMORROW!!!
CAN'T WAIT FOR NEXT WEEK!!! Tee~ hee~ (ok thats gay.)
Wait wait, I CAN'T! That means less time for studying. ZZ.
Oh oh. Now reading: I Kissed Dating Goodbye, by Joshua Harris. In my memory, this book is seriously the 1st book i ever read and feel like reading it all!!! (though it ever happened on other books and it did not last) Actually i have had other book but i either never finish or they are not really story based. Actually, this is not really story-based. Its all very short stories or rather examples only, about christian guided values and viewpoints on not dating and staying single. :-p Well its a good book recommended to me by dear old rui and belonging to grandpa kenneth(cause this book is written in 1997!!!) Rui and i saw it at a book sale on the seminar on sat. Then he was saying, hey i read this book and its real good. Then he told me that kenneth has it. Out of curiousity, I asked Kenn and he borrowed it to me the next day. Its a really good book. I would recommend it to anyone who wants to borrow it. :-p
Oh no. Mum has been admitted to hospital cause of DENGUE!!! Boo!!! But she was lucky cuse no ward so she given A1 like only person in a whole room with aircon and toilet and tv!!! Yay. But maybe only for a day. :-p
My schedule tmr is so inpromtu. Tmr must call orthopaedic doc to see whether can see him tmr cause he has been away and his appointments for tmr is suppose to be full but i want to see him earlier. So like cant confirm whether can see him. If can see him tmr also good cause mum is in same hospital!!! yay. Shun bian visit mum. Den suppose to swim and play badminton also tmr but was cancelled. Den supposedly changed to study out also cancelled. Lol. Like tmr's schedule has been changing so much the past week and its so inpromptu. Lol.
And I HAVE NOT BEEN STUDYING!!! oh no im going to fail my mid years and likely A's. Sian. :(
What!!!! My internet hung on me. Do you know how much i typed on today's seminar and thought???!!! Always when i type super long posts and spent more than an hr. Haiz. Ok don't want to type le. Another time. Good mood also kena spoil. Just this. I so need to study!!! OUT OF HOUSE!!!! with someone who would sit down and study will help so much. Like i gotta pull somebody to study with me!!!!
