I know i shouldnt be blogging. But i couldnt resist this, especially how im feeling now. I am longing to do something i shouldnt(or couldnt) be doing now. especially since i was 'teased' last night.

Ok its like this. I ve been having very vivid dreams last few nights. It is so vivid and so real, and that after i wake up, i felt like i havent sleep like that. See lah, everytime exams are around the corner i become so stressed until i have dream, and very vivid ones some more. Theres 2 bad ones, 1 weird one 1 quite random one, but i guess it was close to something i wanted, and last night, the thing i wanted to do/ to happen, though it isnt exactly a perfect dream, its close to. I like to try to interpret dreams. Some dreams actually might happen for a reason you know. Dont worry i dont dwell on dreams, except maybe last night's one. 1 of the nightmares i had was very chim and super odd. Its like i seemingly am trying to stop this creature from reaching somewhere. Its like i game, then i had to draw crosses at points in a map to reduce its life. But the time limit was like 5 sec and i was doing the map upside down. And after i couldnt stop it, it went to another place, sortof another maze, to my relief. And i am hopefully trying to stop it from reaching that end, but this time, it eats through my defences. However, i noticed there was a hole in my defence, something which it didnt exploit. I dunno the dream felt so scary and fearful lah. Last night one was a great 'teaser' i felt. it was such a great dream you know, but rather than feeling great after it, its like, God are you making fun of me. Lol. Give me this dream at a time where i am dead stressed about the upcoming exams, its not exactly encouraging to give me this dream when i dont need it and like teasing me about the things i want alot. Its like tempting a dog with a bone and asking him to fetch when it's chained to a tree. Not funny you know. oh and the bone will most likely be lost right after it was released some time later. Nvm bad example, but you get my point. Actually, now that i think of it, it is actually something God wanted to show me that thats something I can look forward to after "this" is all over. Something to work towards to? I dont know. Its hard even to think of it this way.

This exam really, i should be, maybe like all other exams, be prepared to fail, badly. Its just i must be able to accept it and say i should be working towards winning the war and not the battle. Its cause all i can see now is a lost battle and its tough to swallow. Im dead stressed at failing this exam AGAIN!!! Im not in that exam mood, and im worried but not working. I cannot take it lah. Im in that "i-cannot-take-this-anymore, i-dont-wanna-care-abt-studying-for-this-exam-anymore" kinda mood. I'm just trying to make sure i dont kill myself of stress and taking measures of it, cause in the past few exams i always fall sick during exam periods like this. Ok i better have a changed mood after taking a nap and get cracking!!!

Waah these feelings.

Waah tt dream. =(