Finally feel refreshed after some time, despite fatigue and lack of sleep. Funny, i actually didnt want to post or talk too much, even on the blog- cause i do talk too much. I realised, i need to learn to be quick to listen, slow to speak. Ive even wanted to start photoblogging- showing photos of what my day has been. But this is important. Important for me to record down the conversations i had with a fellow bro that has encouraged me much and caused me to think alot.


God is faithful. He wil never leave you or forsake you. I think this has been the conclusion i have been gaining from the past 2 months of turmoil. My life has been a mess. And i feel so ashamed of it. Hearing that my mentor has even read this, made me feel even more ashamed. That i have allowed emotions to rule and mess up my life. I feel ashamed that i have strayed away from a focused and determined r/s with God since sch started. Though he has tried to encourage me a few times through His word, i still strayed. I came to a realisation that i am starting to want to remain in this messed up state, just like how it was 2 years ago. The things that come to mind, the thought processes are similar.


Had a good chat with my bro in christ. He was right in pointing out to me that once we were deep in sin, we would want to remain in that state. Sin is always pleasurable. It is always deceitful. Just like thoughts of loneliness. Just like negative thoughts. Just like not prioritising my time. Just like being unable to focus to study for exams, and be distracted, to be down. And bro taught me to learn to try control it so much by my own strength, but learn to pray in a way we often do not realise is impt- to lament to God. To learn to seek God, asking why. There are reasons why God do not curb some sinful habits we may have, despite strongest efforts. In the book of Job, Jeremiah, Psalms, Lamentations, they all lamentated. There is a place for prayer like this that we often neglect, and i must learn to even do so. Hopefully, it'll help.


 My bro, is a lawyer to be. Funny, how our conversation stemmed from him questioning me on how i might oversimplify things of the faith with the things happening around us. It came from the line between law and the faith, which eventually led to how we may be led to not answer others things regarding the faith beyond simply what the bible says. How the church or ppl like us attending church has failed to think or relate things of the faith with this world. It is blind faith. Like worship being a fuzzy, warm feeling, or emotional.


Then we talked abt relationships. I am facing a few friends who are having non christian relationships. And we talked abt it. the immediate verse that came to mind was 2 cor 6: 14-18.



2Cr 6:14-18 NIV - [14] Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness? [15] What harmony is there between Christ and Belial ? What does a believer have in common with an unbeliever? [16] What agreement is there between the temple of God and idols? For we are the temple of the living God. As God has said: "I will live with them and walk among them, and I will be their God, and they will be my people." [17] "Therefore come out from them and be separate, says the Lord. Touch no unclean thing, and I will receive you." [18] "I will be a Father to you, and you will be my sons and daughters, says the Lord Almighty."




 Funny, he had to intentionally challenge me about whether im very sure it speaks of being together with an unbeliever. So what does it mean to be with an unbeliever? Does the verse only talk abt  marriage? Means bgr can? Or does it mean we cannot even fellowship or mix with an unbeliever? We all know that the answer to these qn is a resounding no. But, these are things that a non believer will ask and say. And we must be prepared to answer them, and be convicted of it ourselvess. Like how if you're tgt with a non christian, in the verse, God will not  consider you as His children.


Then we shared abt how difficult it is to know, but doing it is a whole diff matter. I struggled with it a few years ago. And now then i realise, its so plain and obvious in the bible, and how was i able to convince myself of otherwise! And he also shared to me abt his fren's struggle, despite knowing that she was sinning against God, and going home everyday but to cry abt her rebellion against God.


Well, some frens, you just have to trust that they'll hear, and that the Holy Spirit will convict them. Some like my good friend, who is a superficial christian, is a diff matter. We were all talking abt helping diff ppl, we have to use diff approaches. Its not going to be easy. Its not so straightforward. Thats with dealing with ppl.


And sometimes, as bro has sad, we must be very careful, to correct out of love, and not to appear like we are on moral high ground. I know i may appear like im being judgemental sometimes. And thats the problem that comes with correcting without reasoning. Just saying that the bible says so wont convince or convict so easily. Bro's emphasis to me is, correct with love. But i am. It is out of concern, it is out of love. I do not want to lose a sis in christ, but im often mistaken. I always want to help, but im often mstaken. I guess i should be more careful to convince, and not correct. I hope they understand.


Another aspect is testimony. What kind of testimony do we show to others when we are in a relationship with a non christian. Our testimony to the friends around us will all go to smoke. How do we explain our faith!


In a bid to be closer to You, its fb hiatus. I need to surrender- surrender technology for awhile. :)


ok im distracted. later.